5 Months Later

Ryan's  been home for about five months. I can't believe how quickly the time has flown by. After five months back  living together, I have another little insight into military deployments and marriages for you.

Ryan and I spent the first few months in a "second honeymoon" feeling. We've just been so happy to be together that we've over-looked faults and annoying habits. We've probably also tried harder not to annoy each other.

A few days ago we had our first real frustration with each other. It wasn't really a fight, but his annoying habits brought out my annoying habits which brought out his anger which brought out mine. I didn't even want to sleep next to him. Instead of grabbing my pillow to head for the couch, I grabbed his hand, and he held mine.

I realized that it's definitely an okay thing and maybe even a good thing that we are getting used to being together again. Not that I want to take being together for granted, but we can't just go on in a honeymoon feeling. What's left after that feeling is gone is better. It's the commitment. It's the understanding that even though we are both annoying and angry, we aren't going to leave (the bed or the marriage).

Jordon

P.S. I have another small insight for you. We have a new routine. I'll be talking about something. Ryan will say "I didn't know that." I'll start thinking really hard about when it happened. Ryan will ask, "Was that last year?" I'll say, "Yep. Well, now you know." :) Can you imagine what it'd be like to miss out on a year of your life? He missed everything from new roads and stores to graduations and weddings to the everyday feelings and experiences of life in a marriage or family. Yes, I talked to him and told him, but where he was--working as hard as he was--made it difficult for him to even place the events and feelings of home in his mind. It's interesting.